Playette or Poseuse
Woman, it's winter. Enough with the lace, neon-infused tube tops, especially in January. That was so 1988. Can I offer you a few small pieces of advice? First, square earrings don't match oval necklaces. You might want to consider shopping somewhere other than Claire's for your jewelry. Second, you may think you're 'the shit,' sticking your sizeable amount of junk out for a picture that the photographer wouldn't have taken had you not surrounded him with force; but honey, that good-looking man beside you is double-fisting; he'll talk to anything... Poseuse!
This post was inspired by the dread of finding horrible club photos of oneself online...and Roosh.