DC Cookie

Tuesday, January 23, 2007


There is only one way I know how to fight. With kindness.

Hence, why I sit on the sidelines and shockingly observe these monstrous, scathing, verbal battles that ultimately get labeled 'blog wars' and wonder how my creative acquaintances and friends are capable of existing in that state of up-in-arms that I will never comprehend. How traditionally jovial and pleasant women can become so rapidly venomous and enflamed (at what seemed to me an ambiguous, innocuous offense) that claws are bared and skin is slashed in their ireful, slandering diatribe of a riposte. How the male character, who I spent the summer fondly unmasking to reveal a sensitive, loving, gentle soul, could retort with an equally unpleasant dose of vitriol so glaringly contradictory to his nature.

The reasons are simple. Insult, whether intentional or not, breeds that illogical desire for a grandiose and spiteful revenge. It's natural to want to defend one's honour via the means of personal attack and merciless verbal slaughter.
  • He's a cocky, douchebag, poser, steroid-monger of a wannabe with no life
  • She's a porky, psycho, attention-seeking, delirious sloth who can't handle rejection
  • He's not gay

Whatever the cheap shot, the real question I ask is...how does fighting injury with fire help to assuage the injustice? A scathing defense will garner plenty of attention but will not elicit sympathy nor guilt from the offender. Is a weight truly lifted when you turn into someone more odious, in the name of justice, than the person who insulted you in the first place; or does the burden just grow heavier?

If a group of people publicly lynched you for being a contemptible imposter, would under-handedly seeking out their private information for the purposes of retribution really prove that group of people wrong about you, regardless of the validity or insensitivity of the original defamation?

Didn't we learn anything from Gandhi's formidable example? The only way to eliminate injustice is to fight it with virtue. Basting a rash with lye; sealing a broken dam with a band-aid; masking a pungent odor with Drakkar Noir; treating frostbite with icicles; the initial problem will only be exacerbated ten-fold.

Can anyone count the number of enemies of DC Cookie?



  • At January 23, 2007 2:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    I believe I *may* have actually conveyed this somewhere else, but as Gandhi would aptly say:

    "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."

    Great post.

    Love you.

  • At January 23, 2007 2:24 PM, Blogger KassyK said…

    Yes. Yes yes yes yes. Thank you. I firmly agree with all of this. I believe that you should defend yourself (as I always do) but do it with kindness and compassion. That way the attacker always end up looking like the real jerk.

    I learned the hard way but I have definately learned it nonetheless.

    Thank you for this. :)

  • At January 23, 2007 3:12 PM, Blogger Big Head Rob said…

    Do you want to have an enemy? Ha. Just kidding.

  • At January 23, 2007 3:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This was a great post. Seriously great.

    Thanks for putting it out there.

  • At January 23, 2007 3:47 PM, Blogger Virgle Kent said…

    Damn girl great post. Brave….

    Are you sure though that guy you spent the summer unmasking didn’t just have you heavily drugged or sedated for weeks on end?

    Personally in the end I guess one person that knows you who has character speaks volumes over hundreds who’ve never even met you before. But I’m taking baby steps kid.

    My only disappointment in this post was with all the big words used how did you not include the term “Dick Sandwich” hmmmmm??? ;)

  • At January 23, 2007 3:58 PM, Blogger Heather B. said…

    Couldn't agree with you more.

  • At January 23, 2007 4:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i'm gonna go start a metro detroit blog war. now... to find some metro detroit bloggers...

  • At January 23, 2007 4:44 PM, Blogger Phil said…

    One. Marvin. or Melvin. Whatever that guy's name is/was from Ohio, who did not like you at all.

  • At January 23, 2007 4:47 PM, Blogger DC Cookie said…

    And I learned from that encounter that I handled it all wrong... He's no longer my enemy.

  • At January 23, 2007 5:49 PM, Anonymous kob said…

    This is a beautiful post carrying a needed message. Thanks for writing it.

  • At January 23, 2007 5:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I agree. There are people in this world who just won't like you and its better to not waste your time on pleasing those who are unable to be pleased and spend that time making friends who will love you for your good points and your faults.

    Blog wars are lame anyway. I prefer my enemies to be people I can glare at in public.

  • At January 23, 2007 5:58 PM, Anonymous Wiz said…

    Cookie, you know better to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person. You would tear them to shreds.

    Besides, arguing on the internet is like running in the special olympics. Even if you win, you're still retarded. ;)

  • At January 23, 2007 7:50 PM, Anonymous Alex said…

    I think to really tap into Gandhi's wisdom on this subject, you'd have to see how he handled high school, which is the emotional level that characterizes internet "wars."

  • At January 23, 2007 11:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    High school? I think we're talking junior high here.

    You make very good points--still it's hard to take things as humorous when we're the butt of the joke.

    I've been there...felt insulted and singled out by another blogger for no good reason. I was angry, I wanted to lash out. You know what I did? Nothing.

    I hope Ghandi would approve.

  • At January 23, 2007 11:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Ghandi is great in theory. However in my experience, theory does not translate so easily into practice, especially when racist, homophobic bigots shouting threats at you. But kudos to you on not having any enemies - I admit I'm comfortable with having them. And in some cases, I consider it a plus that certain people are on that list.

  • At January 23, 2007 11:28 PM, Blogger Asian Mistress said…

    Props to you my friend. This is why I simply stay out of everything...better to be a pacifist than a protagonist.

  • At January 24, 2007 12:04 AM, Blogger roosh said…

    gandhi died before britain left india

  • At January 24, 2007 7:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Wiz, that wasn't very nice what you wrote about the Special Olympics.

  • At January 24, 2007 9:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Agreed, and well said :)

  • At January 24, 2007 10:58 AM, Blogger honeykbee said…

    Highly optimistic post. The likes of which normally inspire me to argue, but I find it difficult to do so here, as I, too, watch on the confused sidelines as some fine bloggers shoot themselves in their feet. Also, it's nearly impossible to argue with someone who uses the word riposte so eloquently.

  • At January 24, 2007 11:55 AM, Blogger Twoste said…

    No, you must crush your enemies until they are piles of ivory dust in a jar.

  • At January 24, 2007 1:37 PM, Blogger A Unique Alias said…

    No one whom I've chucked in the "worthless" bucket got dropped in there recently.

    No, by and large they've been there for over a year. The perpetuation of petty attacks isn't anything new at all. The grandstanding and freakish desire to be king of the mountain is habitual, and isn't, as you say, the result of a bred "desire for a grandiose and spiteful revenge", but simply their temperament, or personality - - otherwise they wouldn't keep doing it, would they?

    It's the same couple of people, the same problems. You may have found other redeeming traits in them over. That doesn't mean that the other, non-redeeming, negative, disappointing, unimpressive, childish and embarassing traits which they display so strongly aren't just as real and integrated into their personality as the virtuous traits.

  • At January 24, 2007 8:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    kassyk is foxy.

  • At January 25, 2007 10:53 AM, Blogger Phil said…

    I have crushed you with a bat once, Unique. (and arrested you and tortured you after pulling you out of a spider hole)

    Do not make me do it again!!

  • At January 25, 2007 4:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    ...says aua before he hops in the bubble bath

  • At January 25, 2007 11:06 PM, Blogger A Unique Alias said…

    "negative, disappointing, unimpressive, childish and embarassing traits"

    Why hide? Own up to it.


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