DC Cookie

Monday, January 08, 2007

Un-Fashionably En Retard

There's a difference between being fashionably late for an event and inexcusably delayed. I am the latter - always. When I tell my friends I'll be somewhere at 6:30, I typically don't arrive until a quarter to 8. A 7:00 dinner reservation is simply a suggestion for when to leave my house. It never fails that I'm 5 minutes late for important meetings, 15 minutes late for lunch dates or beauty appointments, 30 minutes late for gala events, work, or group dinners, an hour late for happy hours and upwards of 2 hours late for open-ended social engagements.

Although my friends and family have learned to deal patiently with my consistent and abhorrently dilatory arrivals, that doesn't resolve the fact that tardiness is a frightfully annoying habit. Procrastination is among my most signficant character flaws. I loathe being the last one to find a seat at a theater, but I adore the abundance of diversions with which I can distract myself so extensively past the required time of departure.

I wonder sometimes if my dawdling is the necessary, evil byproduct of my pensive tendencies and natural introversion (of course by introversion I simply mean my need for alone time). Because by no means are my actions torpid or sluggish. I'm eternally occupied and overbooked; but consummately fulfilled as a result. Unfortunately, that frenzied fulfillment comes at the expense of those who are perpetually wondering at what ungodly hour I'm going grace them with my audacious appearance.

I apologize profusely on a daily basis for my laggard soul, but there is absolutely nothing in the world that will change me. I'm going to be late for my own funeral...

8 Comments:

  • At January 08, 2007 11:03 PM, Blogger Ar-Jew-Tino said…

    My cousin is the same way so we just tell hoim something starts half an hour to an hour earlier than it actually does. He pretends not to know better and we're all happy.

     
  • At January 09, 2007 9:30 AM, Blogger Twoste said…

    Being late is cool. But being on time for things is the new being late for them. Being late was so 2003 anyways.

     
  • At January 09, 2007 10:07 AM, Blogger Kathryn Is So Over said…

    Cookie Time is something I've grown accustomed to, and am often even grateful for the extra time. I don't know what I would do if you suddenly swung the other way!

     
  • At January 09, 2007 3:41 PM, Blogger Phil said…

    Being late is not cool (nothing personal Cookie) - I am the exact opposite. I am typically early, and hate being late for anyone or anything.

    My wife, however, is like you. But my nazi-like ways of time-scheduling has changed her for the better.

     
  • At January 09, 2007 8:29 PM, Anonymous HeidiChick said…

    I wonder. I have lots of cookie-esque friends. They are not my favorite friends not because they are not wonderful people...but because I pay with my time for their diversions.... I wonder if you peeps would still be so late if we did not put up with it? I used to feel a bit like a doormat, then I just stopped being friends with the "late abusers" and made peace with the "sorta lates" (and decided to never try to be on time for them.)

    I always wonder.....thanks for sharing!!

     
  • At January 09, 2007 10:44 PM, Anonymous Wiz said…

    I cannot seem to make myself late even if I try. Show up right on time, and everybody else is 1/2 hour late. Show up 1/2 hour late, everybody else is an hour late. If I had a dollar for every minute I spent waiting...

    Good thing I can amuse myself at a bar.

     
  • At January 10, 2007 1:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Cookie Time was way worse in college. You've gotten a lot better about it. Really, you have. As they say, admitting there is a problem is the first step to recovery. Either way, I love you just the way you are...

    (Because time with Cookie is love, of course.)

     
  • At January 12, 2007 9:31 PM, Blogger Foilwoman said…

    Does your hairdresser keep your appointment for you when you are 15 minutes late? 30? Your doctor? And what does your boss do when you arrive late to a meeting? What happens with travel? If a friend can't show up to meet me at the time we agreed, I'll wait a little bit, but not an hour. Not half an hour.

     

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