DC Cookie

Wednesday, August 31, 2005


Why am I posting about Buffalo? First, because I just don't feel like writing anything controversial or remotely associated with dating life today. Second, because I love that word. Buffalo. It's so meaty. Every time I say the word my mind wanders towards thoughts of snow and juicy steak, which in turn reminds me of the homeland. I adore Buffalo for:

The City
On the cosmopolitan scale, Buffalo is not exactly leading the way. But there are so many great things about Buffalo. Discount shopping. Original 'buffalo' wings at Anchor bar. Proximity to Niagara Falls, one of the seven wonders of the world (eight, if you count me). Proximity to Canada. Snow, including adequate means of removing the snow from city streets. Towns with cool Indian names like 'the Tonawondas.' The Great Lakes. Last call at 4:00 am. Which leads to my next point...

The Club Life
At the Airport
I spent a weekend in Buffalo with some friends, including a particularly handsome, international DJ acquaintance. Fabulous experience.

The Football Team
I love the Buffalo Bills. One of the best professional sports moments of my life (next to being in downtown Toronto when the Blue Jays won the world series for the second time) was sitting at a Buffalo Bills home game, in the outdoor arena, in December of 2002, while it was snowing. My ex and I were bundled up with a beer in one hand and a hot chocolate in the other. Football in the warm sunshine is ridiculously boring in comparison.

The Food
Bison (contrary to popular nomenclature, the animal found in America is not actually buffalo, but bison. Buffalo is just the nickname. True buffalo only live in Africa) is one of the richest, leanest meats you can eat. Leaner than beef or poultry. I'm a carnivore. I like meat. And thanks to my friend Golden Bear, I now know where I can eat it in the Arlington area!

The Animal
Come on. These things are just so freaking bad-ass. They're massive. They're furry. They can live in extreme heat or extreme cold and not really care either way. They roam in large groups. They're chill. If I were an animal, I'd want to be a Bison. Or maybe a Caribou.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Mooch Men

When you’re in a relationship with someone, you’re not really supposed to keep tabs on who spends what. Relationships generally mean equality. You buy the groceries; he takes you out to dinner. You pay for the airfare; he pays for the hotel. It all pretty much evens out. Right?

Well, I heard a story yesterday that was utterly appalling. An acquaintance of mine is just getting out of a relationship with her boyfriend of 3 ½ years. She moved back to California with plans to leave for Italy within the next few months to live her dream as an artist there. But she can’t go. In the last few weeks, she came to find out that several years of debt for furniture, moving expenses, house wares, dinners, etc. that were charged on a card under her name by her boyfriend have never been paid off. She’s $20K in debt and has nothing to show for it. He took care of the bills while they lived together. He assured her everything was fine. He’s on the fast track and makes a significant amount of money, so she didn’t believe she had anything to worry about. He now has a house full of really nice furniture (that rightfully belongs to her) and she has hideous credit. He won’t return her phone calls or her e-mails.

What. The. Fuck.

I just wanted to hug her. Granted, she should have been paying attention, but when you trust someone, sometimes you let things slide. The whole thing is just so completely pathetic to me. Men who live off the women they are dating are a pathetic waste of a penis. My ex used to pull that shit on me all the time. “Lend me $100 for my night out; I’ll pay you back on Thursday when I get paid.” Thursday rolls around…no re-payment. A month goes by, no repayment. Two months go by and he says, “What $100? Hey, can I borrow $200 for my trip up to see my parents?” Good thing for me, I stopped lending him money very quickly as this became a trend. I never let him touch my credit cards or know anything about my personal finances.

Shitty that it had to be that way, but how is a mooch ever going to learn unless he’s taught some responsibility cold turkey? If he doesn’t learn, ditch him. You’ll have a much more secure future on your own.

Monday, August 29, 2005


I'm sorry - but this is freakin' hilarious. I do crap like this all the time when I'm getting ready to go out, but never in front of a webcam for people to witness.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Trance Hooooooo-kah

What do you do when you're 28, you don't do club drugs, you can party with 18 year olds even though you feel like their grandma and spend more time lecturing them about what they're doing to their bodies than having fun, but you're still into trance music? Sorry. I'm Canadian. It's just part of our culture. We like the fast beat. We like to bounce. It was etched on my soul when I was 16 - it's permanent.

So, now that I'm old enough to be these people's mother, how do I go enjoy a techno show without being 'that girl' at the club? Do I hit the VIP lounge of Fur, or do I suck it up and allow it to blast solely from my Ipod, but nothing more? Am I too old for the genre?

Jess_Darude_DJ Booth

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Why Are You Single?

I hate that question. I know it's supposed to be flattering. I suspect the person who asks it is implying that I'm so ridiculously fabulous (correct observation), that s/he can't believe some man hasn't put a ring on my finger yet. However, for some reason, I find the question unnerving. Instinctively I want to answer, "Because I have leprosy." Or maybe, a-la praying mantis, "Because every time I finish mating with a man, I bite his head off." No really. What am I supposed to say when somebody asks me that? "Oh shit, you're right! I didn't realize. Thanks for reminding me! Crap! I'm single! I'm in my late 20s. My uterus is definitely drying up. Help, quick, find me a man, immediately!!"

Why am I single? Typically I just shrug my shoulders, smile impishly and divert the conversation. I'm single because that's what I'm supposed to be. I'm Yin and I just haven't met my Yang. Simple as that. If that doesn't make sense to you, then instead of asking me about it...hook a sister up! Damn!

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Wrong Side of the Bed

Worst way to start the day: Have a VERY vivid dream about being alone at a concert, only to run into your ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend making out and fawning over each other right in front of you, taking breaks every once in a while to look over at you with both spite and pity.


Monday, August 22, 2005

In Memory

The Cavs lost former defensive end Ljubomir Stamenich on the 18th to leukemia. Tough to lose one of your own, tougher when he's that young, and toughest to be friends with people who were personally touched by his life. You're all in my prayers...

Eligibility Circle

Opinion poll. Here are three somewhat recent scenarios in my life. I don't see the harm in any of them. It's DC. It's a small city. These things are bound to happen, and life should just progress onwards. I don't think familiarity should be a limiting factor when you're not dealing with serious emotional attachments or relationship history.

1. Break up with ex. At bar one night, run into someone I originally met MANY years ago through the ex. They're acquaintances. I don't really think they run in the same social circles, at least not frequently. We flirt. A lot. Ex already has a new girlfriend. There is no chance of a reunion between me and the ex. Do I assume the friend knows everything, or do I talk about it up front? Is the friend a viable candidate?

2. Hanging out with group of friends. One guy in group is being very flirtatious. He eventually asks for my number. I've dated one of his friends before. Never seriously, with mutual agreement that it wasn't going to go anywhere. Do I have to limit myself from going out with this guy because I've gone out with his friend? Should I be skeptical about his intentions (assuming guys talk)? Viable candidate?

3. Again, hanging out with a group of friends. End up talking to a guy who seems familiar, but can't place from where. We go through a list of people we know and places we typically go. Finally, we discover that he went on a few dates with a girlfriend of mine a while back, nothing serious. I know the girl is already smitten with somebody else. Viable candidate?

In Cookie's opinion, the only 'off-limit' candidates should be a) ex-boyfriends of your good friends; b) guys your friends have been smitten with for many years (with the caveat that a good friend would probably not prevent you from dating said guy if she knew he were smitten with you in the same way); and c) guys your friends are currently dating/pursuing.

Meh, what do I know?

Friday, August 19, 2005

Time Warp


I went to my Grade 8 reunion this past weekend (yes, that's Grade 8, not eighth grade). I planned a quick, whirlwind, weekend trip to Toronto which I do every 4 months or so to alleviate my Canada withdrawal. Coincidentally, the other two members of the Bobsey triplets (me, Teddy, Sharon) were also going to be in town. Coordinating our schedules is difficult enough (we are rarely in the same city more than once a year, let alone our hometown, since the three of us all work in the States now), so we decided on a reunion. Sharon wasn't about to let it be just any reunion, though...she wanted our entire Grade 8 class to come.

Keep in mind, we had no idea where at least half of these people were. Didn't stop Sharon. Within a week, she had found 14 of the 16 members of our class, as well as our teacher, and had contacted each of them (Sharon - when that viola thing gets old, you may want to consider cyber-stalking as your next line of employment). Everyone she called, who was still in the Toronto area, delightedly agreed to an early Sunday evening meeting at a bar downtown (except for Z, who I guess must still be bitter about being teased 15 years ago, get OVER it, we were 12!).

The meeting felt like a time warp. 15 years later and we all look the same (add facial hair, a little gray, and a few more curves). Not to mention, our lines of employment were predictably in sync with our grade school personalities. From left to right in the picture above, we have:
  • The Perpetual Student (finished his PhD classwork when he decided to go back for a law degree)
  • The Philosopher (okay, I made this one up, because I don't recall what he's up to, and Philosopher just sounds cool)
  • The Engineer (and energy aficionado)
  • The Consultant
  • The Classical Musician (traveling the world with her $300,000 viola)
  • The Investment Banker/Venture Capitalist
  • The Phys. Ed./Special Ed. Teacher (inspired by the Original Teacher)
  • The Stage Actress (got her debut in the Grade 7 play)
  • The Original Teacher (still teaching)
  • The Jazz Musician (who is about to head to Japan to teach English and clear his head)
  • The Attorney

Hell of a class. Blew me away that after 15 years, we could get together just as if it were 1990. Although, I had trouble calling Mr. J by his first name (who was only two years older than we are right now when he was teaching us), pretty much nothing else had changed. Same class clowns, same quirks, same senses of humour...

Hope I don't have to wait another 15 years to see these phenomenal people. They didn't call us "giftees" for nothing. Good times!

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Minor League Baseball

Men in uniform - Yum. Tight uniforms - Yummier. Athletes in tight uniforms - Yummiest!


It's official. I love Single A baseball players. I went to see the West Michigan Whitecaps vs. the Kane County Cougars last night. I was in lust with about half the players. A bunch of low maintenance, 18-24 year old, well built, aspiring athlete, country boy, tadpoles in tight pants, about 5 feet from my seat.

I cheered for both teams.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Can I Do Better?

I was having a discussion with DCB today about this exact subject. It's only natural that when Girl and Guy start dating, they are going to experience some doubts. After the short honeymoon phase, the flaws become apparent. Girl and Guy both begin to contemplate whether or not these quirks are deal-breakers, or whether they can compromise. In the overall scheme, Girl and Guy are the same. Initially overwhelmed with attraction and desire, then somewhat more thoughtful and analytical when the smoke clears.

The difference? The topic of contemplation.

Girl ponders the following when deciding whether or not to commit to Guy:
  • Is he stable enough to provide me with a good home for children?
  • Is he healthy?
  • Will he be adventurous and try new things with me?
  • Is he romantic?
  • Is he kind to his wait staff?
  • Does he have a good relationship with his family?
  • Does he call frequently enough?
  • Does he shower me with enough attention?
  • Do I like his choice of friends?
  • Does he make sacrifices for me?
  • Can he dance?
  • Does he party too much, or will he take a Friday off to watch movies with me?
  • Does he open my car door?
  • Does he listen to me?
  • Does he respect me?
  • Does he reciprocate?
  • etc. etc. etc.
Looks last. The rest is more important.

But what about Guy? What makes him decide whether or not to continue to play the field? One thing, and one thing only. He asks himself, is there someone out there who is hotter than the girl I'm with right now? The idea of 'can I do better?' has nothing to do with marriage, future, kids, stability, employment, spontaneity or intelligence (those things only enter the picture when Guy determines that Girl is the best arm candy he can find). When he finds the hottest woman he can, who also fits all the personality traits he desires (see above list), then he marries her.

Looks first. The rest comes later.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Dating Cliches

Some dating-game terminology that just doesn't make sense to me.

You'll find him when you're not looking.
I don't buy it. Isn't that counterintuitive? Because really, not looking is synonymous with not available. And if you don't make it apparent that you're interested in sharing your bed with more than a stuffed duck, how is Mr. Right going to know to approach you? If you're single, and you want a relationship, you should always be looking. That doesn't mean tattoo "Needs Date" across your forehead, but a girl should always keep her eyes open. That's how you find the diamond in the rough, by seeking him out.

Mr. Right.
Yeah, I said it above. That doesn't mean I can't take issue with the term. It's so corny! Besides, I think I'm secretly searching for a left-handed guy (Electra complex - my Dad is a lefty), so wouldn't my Mr. Right really be Mr. Left?

There are plenty of fish in the sea.
First, men are not fish. They're more like boars. Why not say 'there are plenty of boars in the jungle?' But let's presume men are fish, and the good men are cod; us women are pretty much screwed. The fishing 'industry' has been depleting the cod resources for years. Foreign countries invade our waters and ignore the fishing laws. With the cod population at dangerously low levels, women turn to mackeral or tuna for sustenance. There really aren't plenty of fish in the sea. Now what girls, red meat?

I'm the best thing that ever happened to you.
Then why is he with someone else? Girls all say this as a defense mechanism when they get hurt, hoping the guy will change his mind. Women should walk away proudly from a failed relationship and accept that, for whatever reason, it wasn't the best love match. The most confident women don't have to say things like this.

He's just not that into you.
Annoying! There are so many other ways to say this. Stop quoting Sex and the City already! He's just not that into you because you read books like 'He's just not that into you.'

I Know You Want To Be Me, Verbatim

DC Blogs pointed me to a very interesting site. Someone has basically ripped off my entire blog, verbatim, pictures and all, and is posing as me from another location (KOB mentioned Antigua?). Perhaps to try to generate ad revenue through google adsense?

Spam comments are bad enough, but a complete and total copyright infringement on another site? I probably shouldn't even link to the bastard at txthub.com who has stolen my identity and my words, but I wanted to make sure this doesn't happen to everyone else.


Thursday, August 11, 2005

Friend Zone

The term ‘friend zone’ doesn’t mean ‘just friends.’ (Remember my Harry/Sally theory). The friend zone occurs when the relationship just isn’t going in the direction that one or both parties originally thought it might. The romantic possibilities come to a halt. How you get there can vary depending on the situation. Sometimes one party doesn’t make enough time for the other. Sometimes the physical chemistry is there, but one party doesn’t want the emotional responsibility of a label. Sometimes the physical chemistry isn't there. Sometimes one party is too shy to admit how he/she is feeling about the other and opportunity subsides. Sometimes one party has an overly passive personality and the other party perceives this as lack of interest. Sometimes the perceived lack of interest really IS a lack of interest. Sometimes one party is too aggressive and the other party gets scared. Whatever the case, how do you know when you’ve hit that friend zone and it’s time to give up? From Cookie’s perspective, these are some of the tell-tale signs that it's time to divert your romantic interest elsewhere:
  • He/she used to e-mail, call or text you once or twice a day, randomly. Now he/she writes once a week. (Often, the once a week communication starts off with the words 'sorry, I've just been so busy').
  • He/she used to try to hook up with you all the time. Now he/she claims to be too tired (or worse, blames you for being sleepy). If the person is feeling you, sleepiness is not a factor.
  • He/she calls you 'buddy' instead of 'sweetie.'
  • He/she doesn't ask you to join when he/she is socializing in the evenings with friends.
  • He/she wanted to know what you were up to all the time, but now he/she doesn't really ask. Or when he/she does ask, he/she doesn't respond with much enthusiasm.
  • He/she used to be available on the weekends. Now he/she is only available on Monday nights.
  • He/she just wants to 'go with the flow' (traditional man-speak for doesn't want to commit).
  • He/she doesn't ask you on dates.
  • He/she doesn't respond (or just giggles) when you say something romantic.

Can you return from the friend zone once you're in it? Rarely. When you recognize that you are on the very brink of the friend zone, there are drastic tactics you can use to salvage the romance (e.g. sneak over to his house wearing very sexy lingerie, give him/her a surprise romantic gift like a homemade CD or flowers, be very blunt in a discussion about your situtation, stop contacting him/her or responding to him/her and hope he/she notices, send him/her sexy photos, tell him/her you've met someone else and flaunt it...) but to be honest, most of these strategies just end up backfiring. I say, accept it and move on. There are plenty of other worthy candidates out there who do have time for you and who do want to offer you an appropriate amount of passionate attention. Stay proud, it's not a big deal, these things just happen. Besides, having another 'friend' is never a bad thing.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Thrill Seekers

Should I be creeped out that someone got to my site by searching for the words "preteen butt shots?" That is just nasty. Internet porn is one thing. But preteens? Some people have serious issues... Frickin' Humbert Humbert - don't come back!

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

What Do You Do?

I was reading a recent re-post from one of our favourite On Tap magazine columnists who wrote: "It’s Six Degrees of Arrogance, from the guy who makes jack shit working on the Hill but talks to Senators every day, to the fellow who leases a BMW 5-series and lives in Arlington with six other buddies in a post-frat frat house. I can see why the ladies complain...So is DC doomed, forever caught in a vicious cycle of shallow women enabling insecure men?"

This concept got me thinking. What is the deal with DC's fixation on what people do for a living and how much people make? Is it because people in DC are so self-absorbed and self-promoting that if you're not a lawyer, congressman, big-time consultant, lobbyist or famous journalist (aka 'going somewhere'), you'll be spurned by the DC social circuit? I can count on one hand the number of times I've met a guy who hasn't asked me 'so, what do you do?' within the first ten minutes of our conversation. I AM a big-time consultant, but why do you want to know that so badly? Are you really interested in talking to me or are you just using me for networking purposes? Do you have nothing else of interest to discuss with me, because you spend so much of your time talking about your occupation with others who ask you that same question, that you figure it's a standard thing to discuss? Do you want to brag about your career so badly that you ask me first just out of courtesy? Do you think I won't consider you a prospect if you don't make enough money to buy me that $1.5 million house in suburbia when we get married (since, you know, we've been talking for 10 minutes, we should be weighing these issues already)? Is this the only thing that's important to you? Is this the only reason you think I'd like you, or vice versa? Do you want to know that I'm success-oriented so you're relieved of the pressure of always paying for me when we go out?

Next lucky guy I meet who touches on at least 8 discussion points that are completely unrelated to my career before asking the infamous question wins the rights to my phone number...(trust me - this isn't a risky offer on my part)!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Virginia is for Lovers...and Lushes

The Day-time:
Oasis Winery Landscape
Could Virginia be any more beautiful? I've never been to Napa Valley or France, but I have been to Temecula and I've sampled a lot of wine in my lifetime. I have to say, Virginia makes wonderful wine. Really, who would have known? I went wine-tasting on Saturday and can't imagine a much better way to spend a day. My [new] friends and I hit five vineyards in the rolling hills of the Blue Ridge mountains, sampled over 25 different varieties of wine, and came home with a lot of great stories and 15 fabulous bottles of wine for upcoming dinner parties. Anyone want to host?
At Rappahannock Cellars. We don't look rowdy, but we were. Winos are like that. Classy by appearance only. 5 tastings later though...

The Night-time:
B-Movie Girls
What do you get when you put a birthday girl and a horrible tarot card reading together? A script for a B-movie (LMR to write, cast and direct) and lots of cleavage (aka boobies galore)! Robin and I are expert lushes, but add the luscious birthday girl to the mix for one night and mayhem ensues. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Kathrynon!! The rest of the pictures will remain where they belong - just in the group.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Nectar of the Devil

You are at a bar. You see a cute girl. You want to chat with her. Usually the move here is to tell her you'd like to buy her a drink and ask her what she likes. Under 'some' circumstances, usually in a group situation, you might end up purchasing shots instead. Maybe you know two of her friends, and the friends are suggesting you all do shots. At any rate, you want to stay on your A-game to attract the girl. Words of advice...

jager shot


I repeat. Jagermeister is the nastiest crap that only really dumb-ass frat boys drink to get fall-down wasted. Ladies do not need to be imbibing that sewage. It is just foul. I know you don't want to buy her a purple hooter for the sake of maintaining your male dignity, but you still don't need to resort to jager to prove your manhood.

Stick to Soco and lime, or a kamikaze. The ladies will appreciate that you were thinking of their well-being, and your friends won't make fun of you for being a sissy. You want to give her a little buzz so she relaxes around you, you don't want her to puke on you. Trust me...jager is NOT an A-game beverage.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Catty Bitches

Women can be so unnecessarily catty sometimes. I don’t get it! For the most part, isn't the issue between you and the guy? Why hate on the next women he’s with?

Case in point. I went to a salsa dancing lesson last night with my friend Austin (insert wise-crack here about that statement of friendship, and again, I’ll prove my Harry/Sally argument). Hilarious guy, totally has his shit together, but…this boy is a player. Which isn’t to say he’ll never commit to someone fabulous, but since he hasn’t found her yet, he plays. And why not? Women let him. At any rate, we’re sitting at the bar having a glass of wine when he looks past me and says “uh oh, don’t look.” When someone says ‘don’t look’ instinct is to turn around immediately, which is what I did. Walking past us were two relatively attractive girls. Of the two, apparently Austin had ‘dated’ (I use the term very loosely) the brunette off and on, although each ‘date’ was entirely physical, including the first. Things were clearly going nowhere from the beginning, and from what I understand, the ‘relationship’ ended when she stood him up and he told her to lose his number. Not that pretty, but in essence, she was the ass. Besides, this happened a while ago. You would think she’d be over it.

Why then, when the brunette spotted him, and subsequently me sitting with him, did I get the iciest, nastiest stares for the next hour? Is this MY fault? Although I couldn’t hear it, I can pretty much guarantee this was the conversation:

Brunette: Ugh, there’s Austin, he’s such a jerk.
Friend: What is up with that girl he’s with? Nice outfit, what…did you just come from the office (yes, as a matter of fact, I did)?
Brunette: She’s totally not even cute, he’s stretching. Toootally pressed. Too bad I stood him up and he has to dig in the doghouse now (high fives Friend and laughs).
Friend: Look at her giggling at his jokes (actually, I’m smiling at how sad it is that you feel you have to make fun of me), she is so desperate.
Brunette: Yeah, and nice hair, whatever, who is her stylist, Medeusa? Please!
Friend: Whatever, she can have him, you are SO much better off…

Etc. etc. I just wanted to smack them! Grow up! Women have enough issues with men that we don’t need to be dogging each other too! Unless some woman went blatantly out of her way to steal your man, trust me…it’s not the woman’s fault the guy doesn’t want to be with you. Get over yourself and find someone who actually cares about you instead of attempting to feel better by making fun of the other women your ex chooses to date. Especially when the girl he’s with might not even be his date!!!

Stupid ho-bags. You are definitely not allowed in the A.R.L.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Harry and Sally

Can an attractive single woman and an attractive single man really be friends? It’s the on-going ‘When Harry met Sally’ argument, and I’m going to side with Billy Crystal on this one. If they’re both attractive people, and both uncommitted (for the sake of avoiding a discussion of infidelity, about which I’m extremely opinionated), one or the other is bound to have a crush. Sure, both people can ‘say’ they’re friends, but underneath, one of them is hoping something more will come out of it, whether that’s a relationship or just a romp in the sack.

I hesitate when a single girlfriend says to me “you HAVE to meet my gorgeous, awesome friend X. He’s fabulous, you’ll love him.” That doesn’t make sense! The problem with this statement is, if he’s so fabulous, then she probably wants him, but is pretending not to because they both exist momentarily under the guise of ‘friendship.’ Why would I want to go after a guy that my friend already likes? Either that, or he’s not ‘really’ as fabulous as she says he is and I won’t be interested. It’ll just be another guy that I have to 82nd Airborne when I go out with him.

Here are some examples of classic ‘you’re not really friends but pretending to be’ statements (all of which I’ve heard at some point):
  • “I’m going up to NYC to see my friend Y. I’m spending the weekend at his house, but it’s totally cool. Nothing will happen because we’re just friends.” (B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T. She’s playing the dumb, naïve, school-girl role but knows deep down she’s going because she wants him).
  • “I would never go there…we’ve been friends forever.” (C-R-A-P. They’ve been friends forever because she’s wanted him forever).
  • “We dated for a little while and it didn’t work out, but I’m really enjoying our new-found friendship.” (L-I-A-R. She’s just biding her time before she has another opportunity to date him).

Seriously, think about it. It’s a fundamental theory of the rules of attraction: Hot single girl + hot single guy = sexual tension. They can act like friends all they want, but deep down, their animal instinct is telling them to get naked.

Monday, August 01, 2005

The Evolution of a Cookie

Linz posted a comment about a horrible hairstyle trauma she had when she was younger that left a small scar on her childhood, which indirectly spawned the idea for this quickie post. Linz - when you see picture #3, you'll know I was right there with ya babe!

Who Is Cookie_Baby
The birth of Cookie.

Who Is Cookie_kid
Cookie as a self-confident, pretty little kid with pretty little curls.

Who Is Cookie_preteen
WHAT THE??? Yes. Preteen years are awkward. No way around it. I grew too fast, my hair turned kinky, I had braces, I wore baggy, cable-knit sweaters, and I thought bangs were a good idea (meant to hide the pimples, but only made them worse. Especially straight, with a curling iron dent, and hairspray - gawd, my poor parents!) Thank goodness that didn't last long!!

Who Is Cookie_HS
High school graduation. So the lipstick is a bit much and I hadn't met with an eyebrow waxer yet, but it certainly could have been worse. We're talking mid-90s here. At least the hair was under control.

Who Is Cookie_Adult
Cookie today. See - the braces did their job!

Awkward Moments

I swear, the dating world can be so difficult sometimes. Recall, I avoid confrontation and difficult situations as often as possible. When I have disagreements with people (although rare), it’s usually over e-mail. When I have to tell someone something difficult, I spend about eight hours preparing myself, on the verge of vomiting, and then often end up chickening out and ignoring the issue entirely, or only saying half of what I meant to say. Add that confrontation-avoidance to the world of dating, where assertiveness is required to either a) get what you want or b) get away from what you don’t want, and you can just end up with one big ol’ awkward dilemma.

Take this weekend for instance. Cookie, the big sucker for making sure everyone ‘else’ is having a good time, volunteers to take an out-of-town acquaintance around DC for a tour of everything the city has to offer. It was his first time here, and the few other people he knew in DC were away for the weekend. Lots of pressure for me to make it a good experience, but I’m gracious that way, and besides, I got to do those typical DC things that us residents often avoid (damn annoying tourists!!).

Here is where the awkward part comes in. After a full day of site-seeing and an early roof deck dinner (during which there was much conversation about my current crush, where we met, how I know him, why I like him, etc., etc. - giving off NO vibes that I was wanting anything from this out-of-town guy except to be tour guide), we go back to the car and he goes in for a kiss. SHIT! F**K! I ducked. I mean – we’re not just talking turn the face so he hits the cheek, we're talking full-on hand-blocking, face-tilting, run-to-other-side-of-the-curb motion to avoid the contact altogether. What was I supposed to do? This wasn't a date!! I felt like a complete ass, but I had no other choice. I wasn’t interested, and I really didn’t think that I’d acted in any manner that might suggest I was. I suppose it got better from there once we laughed about it, he recovered, and I actually used the term '82nd Airborne' to describe what I'd just done and why. But gawd, those first few minutes afterwards were the worst.

Ugh…it can just be so f'n uncomfortable sometimes!

UVA Football - Best Wins

As a follow up to my post on July 25th, I believe that's me in the sea of people at the bottom of the link.

Go Hoos!!
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